This article is dedicated to everyone who was once like me;who once suffered low self- esteem, or anyone who is currently in that situation or someone who has just been healed.
I will share a little bit of my story just to encourage somebody.
When I was growing up, I used to imagine I was not good looking. Infact whenever somebody (Including my own mother) would tell me I'm beautiful, I would feel like they are lying to me. I hated my hair(which was brown and scanty), I hated my tall legs and slender body, I hated most of all my eyes( because some of my classmates from lower primary used to make fun of my eyes that they were big) And so as young girl growing up to teenage hood, beauty was not anything for me. Something weird, because I dint like my eyes, I started getting regular eye infections. I even sat for my standard 8 KCPE(final exams) with a very bad eye infection called 'mbatata'
During my time in High School, I struggled accepting myself. I was always looking for appreciation from others.My eyes were still a bother and sometimes I would try to make them look smaller (which was impossible haha!)
I remember very closely one of my dear friend's infact best friend (Rose) took note and kept on telling me I had beautiful eyes. To be honest, whenever I looked at ,myself in the mirror I saw big/bad eyes( just like the small boys back in primary would tease me)
Rose kept on affirming me that,'Brenda one unique aspect about you are your eyes. They are well shaped' .I didn't see that. At first i thought Rose was saying that to me because she wanted me to feel good about myself.After sometime, I decided to look at myself through her eyes and for once I noticed for sure those eyes were not just big...they were beautiful! You can imagine what was happening to my inner being. I didn't like my hair still, neither my body(I had added weight then) but I began to love my eyes.
Well someone may be wondering why I'm sharing all these. Its because I know many people are suffering under their own skin and have believed a lie like I once did. The lie is "You are not beautiful! You need to change your skin tone to be accepted" That's far from the truth of God! Truth is you are fearfully and wonderfully made"
Flash forward, the moment i stopped believing the ugly lie form the devil, I began to see myself in the eyes of God. I began appreciating myself for who I am. I began to appreciate other people genuinely without being jealous of who they are.
Then something outstanding that happened and the best lesson ever. God taught me what real beauty is all about. He taught me about inner beauty that reflects outside. He taught me about spiritual beauty that comes by spending time with Him, in His presence and with His word. Then He taught me about a quiet spirit that is precious in His sight. Slowly by slowly I began to realize that the more I spend time with Him, the more I began to realize that I am made in His image and likeness and every other lie was dispelled away. But He didn't leave at that, He made me understand that I am precious in His sight. Friends this is real. I actually began to see this reflected on my outside.God helped me loose weight. He did and He continually beautifies me! Infact I depend upon Him for beauty just like I do in everything, silly as it may sound.
Its just the other day my husband and I were going through a library of some photos and I was looking at myself and saying, "Wow! is this me!" Is this the girl who was once suffering low self- esteem" And he told me,'You are very beautiful Brenda, inside out!'
I knew its the story behind the glory.Its God.
I don't know your story. But I can assure you there is glory. God wants you to know that you are beautiful. He is much more interested in your character; molding you to the image and likeness of Jesus Christ. For me, that is true beauty that reflects outside. That's your glory! You are beautiful child of God! You are His masterpiece! unique in every way and precious in His sight. Focus on Him and He will reveal to you what your beauty is all about.Its not for boasting but for purpose:) Think about Esther of the Bible. That's a story for another day.
Be blessed child of God.
Brenda Calvince
No comments:
Post a Comment